Earth Day is coming
I've got to prepare!
Never mind fire.
Never mind air.
Never mind water.
I want to be clear.
They just don't matter;
It's earth that is dear!
So burn down the forests;
Dump crap in the sea;
Fill in the wetlands
With dirt, you see!
Gravel is lovely
And worthy of praise.
I'll roll on the ground
For the rest of my days.
(Just for the record, environmental degradation is bad. I don't actually support destroying the earth. I do, however, support poking fun at environmentalists. Also, this post is not meant to a nuanced argument of any sort. It is a lousy poem based on two meanings of the word "earth." Also, the earth doesn't need a special day. Unless you want to celebrate its birthday. Would that be creationist? It's all very confusing. This is why I just write lousy poems. They are easier than trying to explain yourself to people with wide-ranging assumptions.)
1 comment:
I'd better get my chain saw tuned up in preparation for the big day!
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